A Euphoric Mirage

I remember when I was little, I swore to myself I'd never get married. I'd never feel lonely as long as I had my Power Ranger action figures. Then, maybe a decade later, I decided that I wanted to get married, and be the best husband ever. I know, I know... a complete 180-degree turn, but I'm sure we all went through this as a child. I had an idea of what a good husband/boyfriend was, I guess from watching TV shows and hearing stories. So now, screw power rangers! I just want to be the best boyfriend/husband ever! I wanted to love another to the best of one's abilities!

I always wanted to buy my girlfriend flowers. I would see that kind of stuff on TV, and the girl receiving the flowers was always ecstatic to receive flowers. I didn't really understand why girls liked flowers so much, I never really thought it was a big deal, but whatever makes them happy I suppose. And for some reason, at a young age, I learned that there is a big difference between simply buying the flowers from a shop on the way home, and picking up some flowers from a park or a notarized florist two towns away, and that girls somehow knew the difference.

I also always wanted to make breakfast in the morning before I leave, for my significant other. I remember seeing (probably from a drama) the guy making food and leaving it out on the table/desk for the girl when she wakes up. But a good boyfriend doesn't just leave the food there. He's gotta make sure to cover that baby up so no dust gets on it. Also make sure the kitchen is clean and the sink is empty so when the girl is done eating, she has little to no work to do. He also leaves a cute little note with the meal. Probably saying something about how peaceful the girl looked while sleeping so he didn't have the heart to wake her from her slumber. I am the type of person that needs to witness the fruits of my labor. I can't possibly leave a delicious meal hoping she will eat it and enjoy it. Maybe I could hide in her closet and wait till she wakes up to enjoy the meal... then sneak out somehow afterward.

A good boyfriend should also know how to cook up a mean steak. I don't remember where I got this from, probably just from watching my parents. But I feel like a man needs to be able to make a good steak. Give man fire, and meat, and he shall conjure a meal fit for the Gods.

I always pictured taking my girl to a nice clean park on a sunny day, where the grass is as green as it gets. Sit on a blanket under the biggest oak tree by a big open lake and share stories while eating homemade sandwiches, maybe play the guitar and sing for the girl as she sits back and admires my singing.

My most recent desire was to be filthy rich. I want to make so much money that my girlfriend's/wife's shopping-spree can turn into a weekly event. If she wants to shop, then by all means.. shop till you drop!

I also always envisioned being so much smarter than the girl. Not implying I wanted to date a stupid girl, or girls are stupid. I mean, I always wanted the girl to look up to me. I wanted my girlfriend to look to me for information, whether it was about quantum physics or how to fold a paper-airplane. I wanted teach her new and amazing places or things. Help her open her eyes to the world and discover new challenges.

I always wanted to somehow get a room filled with candles with a table for two in the middle of the room. A nice tall candle in the middle, and a rose. The meal... of course, would be a Steak fit for the Gods! Haha! And for dessert, a nice custom made cake, or a little cupcake.

I've had these visions for maybe the past 10 years? And I'm finally starting to realize why these things only happen in TV dramas or movies... because realistically, its very difficult to achieve these things. And if it does come true, its one of those rare occasions, and that guy is the perfect catch for any girl. Because if you've got a guy who's able to do ALL this... then you've got yourself the "cutest," richest, smartest, most caring guy with A LOT of time on his hands. I'm starting to realize now, these weren't goals. These were euphoric visions of my childhood desires. In the real world, as young adults, we all know what it is we want. But we also understand that what we want is not necessarily what we can have. Every girl wants a guy like this, but is every guy capable of delivering such happiness? Call me a pessimist, or call me lazy, but I am starting to think that this childhood desire, was just a mere euphoric mirage, and this hazy vision is finally starting to clear up. Now I finally see that these aren't what bring people together. A fat juicy steak does not invoke love. Nor does a breakfast in bed help flourish a new found admiration between two people.

It's the minute things in a relationship that brings two people together, and keeps them together. It's about making each other laugh during those morose times. It's about being there for each other when one is ill. It's about being able to share anything. It's about being the shoulder to cry on. It's about knowing when to say "I Love You." Cooking for her, planning a picnic, or buying her flowers shouldn't be the only thing to do to show someone you care. These ideas were absolutely childish of me to concoct, and now I finally see the truth. The euphoric mirage of my childish desires have faded and the truth appears before me today... I just hope it's not too late.